Moving Through the Pain

Sometimes in life people surprise you, and not in a good way. I have been going through a major life change as I separate from my husband, a person who I truly thought was a partner for life. As soon as I became truly cognizant that we would be splitting for good, I turned to my cards 🔮, at times in a feverish manner as I sought guidance and a sense of peace, to ground me as I tried to cope with the pain and loss of what I once thought would be an eternal love.

555 (a change is occurring) started to reveal itself in time sequences daily. My manifestation deck kept telling me that the current changes in my life were blessed. I tried to believe (and as time goes on it gets easier, I am now two months into the process). I started to not recognize my husband as he fell for another woman. In fact his relationship began while we were still in our relationship and I thought just going through a rough time. I escaped to the familiarity of my parents home. And he into the arms of another. Lesson learned, nothing is forever. And if you truly love, you will remain unattached, and when it is time, you will let go. I am still working on letting go, it gets easier with each passing day. One of the main problems in our relationship is that I became too attached, and now I am learning how to be me again, and free!

I was more lost than I had ever been and I needed guidance. As such teachers started to appear! I found awesome websites like PurposeFairy.com which I devoured as I embraced this time of change and reinvention. I found a great friend through a chance on-line encounter and she has been a great support to me...guiding me to reconnect with the goddess within, and so I have begun to... pulling goddess cards daily and then googling how to invoke the various goddesses into my daily life.

Deep meditation and reflection revealed to me that I had lost my light. The former vibrant and independent me had gotten lost in the us. I am starting to find myself again and make my own way! I am starting to find my way through deep meditations, journal work and self reflection, reading "Heal Yourself Heal Your Life" by Louise Hay, working with goddess, doing mantras daily to Ganesha the remover of obstacles and Kuan Yin who brings in compassion. And following my heart as it guides me to a better place and heals from a deep loss. These are some of the things that have helped me through this truly difficult time, and I hope if you are going through a similar experience, that some of this stuff helps you too.

In light,

JYN Star

Dream, Love, Know.

Riding the Wave of Change

There are definitive moments in your life where you realize that there is no turning back and that things will never be the same.  This is a powerful time. Today was the 8/8 loin's gate---> and we are headed into a powerful full moon this Saturday.  

My truth is that I have been in the process of reconnecting with myself and the goddess within.  It was time because things in many ways had gotten very low for me (perhaps my lowest). I somehow lost my focus and way. But, the tools I had gathered over the years are what lead to my salvation. At our lowest points on the path of life, the downward turn signals that it is time to turn within. 

"If you can't find light in the darkness, then you will never find it at all"

~Lon Milo

And so I have.  For me this past month has been a time of deep introspection.

I felt dejected and alone, which was a signal that I needed to rebuild community, and so I did. My inner circle is very small, but you always have what you need.  The comfort of long term friendships is unparalleled. And, yet a chance encounter can spark a soul connection, that has lasting impact and will profoundly change you as well, the key is to be open. God is there to help you in the way that you need, and the way that you need is not always the way that you want.

Forgiveness, and moving forward are the only way. Holding onto anger and pain will just slow you down and hold you back. Sometimes you have to just accept, surrender, and release. Trust in you because that is who ultimately has your best interest at heart. And stand in love, pray, have faith, and know that you can get through, and you will always be ok.

~ A quote from the book I am reading

"Artists and creative people who seek inspiration on a daily basis know that the channel to the Above must be kept clear. When an artist is 'in his element,' he is creating something new and wonderful that, surprisingly, is not originating from him but through him."

~ From The Emerald Tablet: Alchemy for Personal Transformation by Dennis Hauck